DIY Couples Retreat Ideas

What’s the best vacation for couples?

A Couple’s Retreat!

If you’re trying to come up with an idea for the best romantic vacation, a couple’s retreat may be just what you’re looking for.  However, finding affordable marriage retreats isn’t an easy task. 

Luckily there are lots of ideal locations that make the perfect setting for a relaxing vacation for couples that can easily be turned into a DIY Couples retreat. 

The Husband and I celebrated our 13^th-anniversary last weekend. 

While 13 may not be a big milestone anniversary for most people, for us it was.  Since we are currently working through our marital problems with a healing separation, this year needed to be celebrated with more than just a date night and flowers.  We needed a full-blown romantic getaway.

Our decision to go away was pretty last minute. 

The typical romantic vacation for two we try to take once a year, usually involves us going somewhere with lots of activities.  But this year filling our days with a bunch of overpriced attractions wasn’t going to do it.  I wanted to make this weekend our best romantic vacation yet, which meant finding something different. 

A couple’s resort, or a marriage retreat, sounded like a great way for us to continue with all the progress we were making working on our marriage and rebuilding our emotional connection.  But when I looked into the couples retreat idea, I fell short on finding what I had been picturing. 

That was when I realized that we didn’t need to go to some marriage retreat that had everything planned out for us.  Instead, we could do our own self-directed marriage retreat, with a focus on spending quality time alone in a relaxed environment. 

What Is A Marriage Retreat?

If you’ve seen the movie “Couples Retreat”, you’ve likely got a bit of an idea about what a couple’s retreat is.  Sometimes they’re called a marriage retreat, marriage Bootcamp, an intimacy retreat or a couple’s therapy retreat, but the idea behind them all is pretty much the same.

Some of these retreats include things like couple’s yoga and other recreational activities.  Others are focused entirely on learning marriage skills and working through marital conflict. 

The purpose of any type of couple’s retreat is to get away from the everyday stresses and busyness of life that get in the way of being able to really focus on your spouse and your relationship.  A retreat gives you the opportunity to spend extended time alone, so you can work on the things you need to work on to build, or rebuild, a strong relationship. 

What Do You Do at A Marriage Retreat?

So, aside from just being a relaxing vacation for couples to focus on one another, what do you do at a marriage retreat?

Well, like in the movie, some form of therapy is usually included in a couple’s retreat.  On top of the therapy sessions, some retreats may offer team building activities for couples, marriage seminars or lectures, workshops on specific topics, or communication activities for couples. 

While many inclusive couple’s retreats also provide accommodations, meals, and opportunities for romance and recreation, not all of these retreats are the all-inclusive type like the one in the movie. 

Some of these “retreats” are actually just workshops that take place over a weekend and don’t take place at some kind of luxury resort.  These types of marriage retreats focus only on learning marriage skills, and sometimes therapy sessions to work through personal issues. And, unlike the movie, you are responsible for your own accommodations and most meals for the weekend. 

How Much Does A Couples Retreat Cost?

Is it possible to find a cheap couples retreat?

If you’re looking for an all-inclusive couple’s retreat, not likely. 

The price range for the inclusive marriage retreats I found ranged from $3000 to $8000 for a weekend.  On top of the cost of the flight to get to them. 

While there are couples retreat locations in most states and provinces, the only affordable marriage retreats I found near me were the weekend workshop type.  Regardless of the location, these types of marriage retreats range from $650 to over $10,000 without accommodations and meals. 

While the weekend workshop type of therapeutic marriage retreat may be ideal for some couples, I did come across another option (located in Texas) that was a bit more appealing. 

Rather than spending the weekend doing marriage therapy and attending marriage seminars, the focus at this retreat was just on spending undistracted time together in a romantic resort surrounded by nature.

While planning a trip to Texas wasn’t going to be possible to pull off in the 3 day’s I had to plan our anniversary trip, it did inspire me to come up with a way to host a couples retreat for The Husband and me on my own.  

The DIY Couples Retreat

If you think the ideal couple’s retreat is the type that focuses on spending undistracted quality time with your spouse, rather than hashing things out with a therapist all weekend, then a DIY couples retreat may the affordable option you’ve been looking for.  And if you do want some of that marriage education you would get at a therapeutic couple’s retreat, I have some ideas for that too. 

These DIY couples retreat ideas can make any trip, whether it’s for an anniversary or valentines’ day or just a much-needed weekend away for two, into the best romantic vacation.  While we may not all be able to afford an all-inclusive retreat, a self-guided marriage retreat is flexible enough for any budget. 

DIY Couples Retreat Location ideas

Where should I go for a romantic vacation?

While an all-inclusive resort on an island would be an ideal location for a DIY couples’ resort, that may be a bit too pricey for most of us.  Though if you can afford that, I would go for one of the adult-only resorts that Sandals offer. 

If you’re looking for something in Canada or the US, Ontario had a beautiful Couple’s Resort in Muskoka and New York has the couples only Cove Haven Resorts in Pocono Mountains.   

If those are too far from you, or still too pricey, you could even look for local golf or ski resorts that offer some recreational activities and all-inclusive packages. 

What if those are all too expensive?  How do you plan a romantic weekend retreat on a budget?

Even if you can’t afford to stay at a nice resort, you can easily plan a DIY couples retreat for less just about anywhere.  The only important thing about the location is that it’s away from the things that may distract you from giving you undivided attention to your spouse.

An affordable local hotel, or one located near some nice nature areas, would make for a good retreat location too.  Since you will be spending most of your vacation alone with your spouse in your room, a suite with some extra space and maybe a kitchen or kitchenette would be ideal, but a regular hotel room would work fine too.

And if that is still out of your price range, go camping. 

While the most affordable option, and still pretty romantic, would be sleeping in a tent, many campsites offer anything from a rustic cabin to a deluxe cabin with private bathroom and kitchens too.  Whether you’re in a tent or a cabin you’ll still get to spend your night cuddling in front of a fire with your spouse, which makes for a nice touch for a romantic getaway. 

A deluxe cabin in Niagara Falls was the option that The Husband and I went with for our DIY couples retreat. It had a master bedroom with a comfy queen bed, a living room and kitchenette and our own full bathroom.  Outside there was a patio table, barbeque and a fire pit in front of a wooden swing.  It may not have been a 5-star resort, but we both found it to be the perfect setting for a relaxing vacation for couples and it was easy to make this our best romantic vacation yet in such a peaceful location. 

Couple’s Retreat Plan

While you don’t need to write out a full itinerary, it’s good to have some kind of marriage retreat outline in your head so you know how you will be spending your time. 

If there are any specific activities you want to do at the location you’ve chosen for your retreat, you may need to plan when you will do them ahead of time.  Maybe the resort you’re staying at has a spa you want to book a couple’s massage at?  Check if the campground has any planned events you want to attend.

At the very least you’ll want to plan out what you’ll be eating so you aren’t scrambling to figure out what to do for dinner at the last minute. 

The Husband and I had a very laid-back plan for our weekend.

Friday we would check into the campground, see what we had to cook with, then go to the grocery store before cooking supper (which ended up being hot dogs cooked on the fire with chips and dip and roasted marshmallows for dessert) and relaxing for the night. 

Saturday, we had nothing planned but going out for breakfast and cooking a steak dinner on the barbeque. 

Sunday, we figured we would go to the Falls since it really is an ideal location to have the best romantic vacation at. 

Marriage Retreat Gift Ideas

Some retreats and resorts provide welcome baskets.  So why not give your DIY retreat the extra touch and make up your own little gift basket? 

Some ideas of things you could put into it are:

• A bottle of wine and wine glasses
• Bottles of beer
• A bottle of your favorite liquor and some shot glasses
• Candles
• Note cards and enveloped to write each other love notes
• Bubble bath (if you have a bath at your location)
• Massage oil (like this EWG verified relaxing Lavender Massage Oil by Aromatica)
• Candy or other snacks

DIY Couple’s Retreat Activity Ideas

A lot of the activities you chose to do will depend on where you end up hosting your DIY couples retreat. 

If you’re at a resort, hotel or campground that offers recreational activities you may choose to take advantage of them and go for a swim, play some volleyball or tennis, go for a drink in the onsite lounge, go for a nature walk or just a walk around the local area. 

Even if the location you chose doesn’t have much to offer you could always try doing a couple’s yoga video together or a guided meditation.  You could relax together in the hotel tub (or jacuzzi if you splurged for that) or take turns giving each other massages, for some added romance.

Instead of turning on the TV, bring a book you would both enjoy and take turns reading it out loud.  Work on some team-building skills by cooking dinner together, maybe even trying out a new recipe. 

If you’re worried you may get bored, the Dating Divas website has a fun relationship game for couples called Core Values or there are some bedroom games if that’s more your thing.  They even have a bunch of free printable couples themed games like Password , Scattergories, Jeopardy, or the Newlywed Game. 

Of course, don’t’ forget to spend some time just cuddling with your spouse and having meaningful conversations too.

While there were lots of things to do at the campground The Husband and I stayed at, the only one we took advantage of was renting a two-person bike and cruising around the campground together for an hour. 

I did print off some couple’s themed games, but we never got bored enough to use them.  Instead, we spent most of our time cuddling on the swing in front of the campfire, having some meaningful conversations about our life together and our plans for the future, which is really what made this the best romantic vacation for me. 

Alone Time?

While it can be tempting to spend every minute of your retreat making up for the quality time you’ve been missing out on at home, it can also be nice to take a bit of time to unwind and reset by yourself too.

Especially if you and your spouse have different ways of relaxing.

A bit of alone time to relax in your own way will leave you both feeling more energized and able to focus on each other more when you’re relaxing together.  

For The Husband, that alone time to recharge was sleeping until 10:00 am on Saturday and having a short mid-afternoon nap.  For me it was enjoying my morning coffee outside when I got up at 7:00 am and reading.  I had brought the book “The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck” by Sarah Knight, which I found very suitable to read in such a relaxing location. 

Both of us felt recharged after these short periods of alone time and spent the rest of our retreat relaxing together. 

DIY Marriage Retreat Education Ideas

you’re looking to add a bit of the typical relationship-building activities and learning into your DIY marriage retreat, there are lots of books you can read (or listen to with a free 30-day audible trial), online downloads or even podcasts you can use to it yourself too. 

Here are a few options you could consider

• One of these relationship workbooks for couples
• Marriage Podcasts, like my favorites The One Extraordinary Marriage Show or The Save the Marriage Podcast
• Ebooks and downloads from One Extraordinary Marriage
• An online resource like The Save the Marriage System

If you are going to add in some marriage retreat learning on your trip, It might be a good idea to make a more detailed marriage retreat itinerary.  Without a plan in place, you’ll risk putting too much focus on the learning and not enough on just being together and having a vacation you both enjoy.  Make sure you don’t discuss any of the more challenging issues of your marriage (save those for therapy when you get home), so you don’t risk ruining your entire weekend. 

The Husband and I skipped on the marriage education, and just focused on spending the quality time together on our retreat and enjoying the romance of the campfire. 

While we didn’t work on any marriage skill-building over the weekend, it is something we have been working on regularly at home.  Currently we are reading and discussing the Seven Principles book, and have read the 5 Love Languages in the past, plus we regularly listen to podcasts together.  While we haven’t tried the other online downloads I’ve suggested above, we are leaning towards buying the Save the Marriage program next.  

DIY Couples Retreat Ideas on a $0 Budget

Sometimes you really need a vacation, but it just isn’t in the budget.  If you’re reading this thinking your spouse and you could really use a marriage retreat, but there just isn’t a way you could afford it, there is still hope. 

It is still possible to do a free couples retreat weekend, right in your own home and make it the best romantic vacations you’ve had. 

But to make this at home couples retreat work, you will need to follow a few rules.

1. Get rid of your kids.  Convince Grandma to take them for the weekend (or even just one night) by telling her how much your marriage really needs this. 
2. Unplug.  Everything.  Your phone, your computer, your TV and any other electronic devices that could be a distraction from the purpose of your retreat.
3. Clean the house before your retreat starts.  And make sure that your to-do list is empty.
4. Buy everything you will need for your retreat ahead of time, so you don’t risk bumping into people you know by running out to grab food in the middle of it.
5. Do what you can to make it feel like you are on a retreat, and not just in your own home.  Put up decorations, fold the towels like the fancy hotel ones, make a luxury bed on the living room floor, or put up a tent in the backyard and camp out. 

While The Husband and I did end up going to the falls, like we often do on our anniversary, we also did something a bit different this time by spending most of our trip just being together.  The cabin we rented made for a perfect DIY retreat location. 

We spent most of Saturday enjoying the relaxing nature of camping.

We added a bit more romance to end our trip on Sunday.  After walking to see the waterfalls, we head back towards Clifton Hill through Queen Victoria Park, spending some time enjoying the rose garden and the rest of the beautiful nature on display there.

Then we found our way to the Oakes Garden Theatre, a beautiful, and often unnoticed, garden at the bottom of Clifton Hill.  Despite being located right in the busyness of the falls, this hidden gem is so peaceful we spent more time relaxing in there than we had at the falls. 

Since we had opted for cooking a meal together instead of going out for a romantic dinner the night before, we decided to go for a mid-afternoon drink and snack at the Rainforest Café.  The romantic atmosphere in the dark restaurant with occasional thunderstorms was a great end to our DIY couples retreat weekend.

While Niagara Falls has a lot of options to plan a romantic vacation on a budget, if you aren’t lucky enough to live as close as we do all it takes is a bit of creativity to make any relaxing vacation spot into the best romantic vacation.  Once you find your ideal location, using some of these DIY couples retreat ideas will turn your trip into your most romantic vacation yet. 

What’s the best vacation spot for couples on a budget you know of?  Do you have any DIY couples retreat ideas to add that would make this the best romantic vacation ever? 

Let me know on my Facebook post and follow me on Facebook to see what else I learn on my journey to live a healthier and happier life.